A child’s story

Posted on 01/08/2023

About four years ago a young lad was referred to Mentor Link, he was getting several red cards a week due to his anger issues.

His mentor Carole worked on controlling his temper and did a session or two on mindfulness, eventually it came out that he was being teased (not quite but almost bullying) and this was the cause of all his anger. They discussed going to speak to the deputy head together, but he did not want to do that. So this is how they worked on it ………
from his mentor Carole…….
I told him to try keeping his face natural and turning slowly away from them and walking slowly away from them but smiling once he turned away. They will not see me smile he said. Why should they I said, you are smiling for you because, you did not get angry, you won’t get into trouble with the teacher you won’t get a red card, they lost you won so you are smiling to remind yourself you won, ok he said I will give it a try.

Over the next few weeks when we met, he said “I won 3 times this week” and gradually these border line bullies realised they could not win with him, until one week we met and he said with a large grin on his face “they didn’t win once this week.”

Soon after I didn’t see him anymore, we would occasionally see each other to wave and smile.

What brought it back to me is, this week we met in the corridor, this is his last term he goes to senior school in September, without missing a beat (we were going in different directions) he said, they have not won in over two years and I have not had a red card, he lifted his hand for a high five, we high fived and kept on walking. I looked behind me and he had quite a swagger and to be honest so did I….. a lovely moment for us both.

Mentor Carole